Thursday, June 13, 2013
Important dates allow us to recall memories, moments and time. Families and friends recall good times and bad through collective memories and it is a wonderful way for family to continue stories from the past and allow their history live on.
Last Tuesday, June 11th, marked one year that I had my cancer surgery. It is amazing to me that it has been only 365 days. Some things are so easy for me to recall from this time, others, most likely due to the morphine, are not so easy to remember and I need to rely on my family for help.
We learn things from our experiences and those of others. The goal when I began this blog was not only to help me get through the experience but, my hope was to help others if, sadly, they had to go through the same type of health crisis. Through this adventure I have learned kindness, goodness, friendship and even sadness. I treasure the time. This may sound strange, but this experience has not only changed me in obvious ways, but I am different and continuing to change, evolve if you will.
Kindness and goodness of others is something that is easy to find at a hospital or oncology office. The staff at Northwestern and my oncologists office were unknown to me when I began what was terrifying to me at the time. Only having the memory of what my mother went through, I was scared and my family, though strong on the outside were scared as well. How they go in day after day and help save lives is remarkable to me. How they helped me, helped others, and how they deal with losing patients, I will never know. Now, I consider these people to be lifesavers and am even more proud that I have one daughter who has chosen to be a nurse and one who is considering surgery.
It may seem peculiar that sadness would be included. Sadness though comes in many forms. There is sadness in losing another part of my body that makes me female. There is sadness in losing what fed my daughters when they were babies. There is sadness in the loss of a few friends. Yet, in the sadness, I find myself learning. I am learning more and more the importance of family. The true security that it brings. We have been put through many tests this past year and have become even stronger. I have learned who true friends are and have found that some are better friends than I may have given them credit for. Those that I have lost, I have learned that they were not true friends to begin with. Does it make me sad? Absolutely, but I have chosen not to dwell on the sadness.
I believe that if we do not learn from our own experiences, we are not taking full advantage of what has happened to us therefore not growing.June 11th will always be a day that I remember. It will continue to bring up memories and emotions, and I expect to continually grow from this experience.